Proclaimer Blog
Ministry and suffering (1): Self pity
This week I'm putting up five posts on ministry and suffering. A wise elder once told me that "ministry is suffering." There's no particular direct Scriptural warrant for that, but every preacher/pastor knows that there is an element of truth about it. That suffering may take many forms:
- it may be personal and spiritual – struggle with a particular sin, for example
- it may be family – illness or trouble in family which can take many forms
- it may be opposition in church – from an individual or a group, or even other leaders
- it may be the hardship of mourning with those who mourn – or watching keen Christians slip away
- it may be the simple wearing down that comes from the sometimes hard graft of ministry
Most ministers know something of all of these. We need to be honest about them and help each other.
Of course, ministry is also joy if it is suffering. There are moments of unbridled joy and delight – and there is always deep Christian joy which comes from our security in Christ. But if the latter is to dominate ministry then we have to know how to think rightly about the struggles – and that is what this week is about. So five posts from my heart – as, to be honest, this is a particularly tough season for us.
Please – no pity. I need no help in this area.
I've been thinking a lot about this. Tough times make me cry. I don't think tears are necessarily unhelpful nor wrong. I certainly don't think the kind of repressed emotion and false masculinity that some people seem to have is godly. But the truth is I often feel sorry for myself when times are tough. Ultimately, this is why I like to solicit sympathy. But self-pity is one of the ugliest of sins. Self pity is self importance by another name. Self pity knows nothing about the sanctifying sovereign work of God. Self pity blinds me to the providence of a gracious God who knows what he is doing. Self pity prevents me from asking the right questions in difficult circumstances.
It saddens me greatly, therefore, to find self pity in my own heart. But if I'm honest I must confess pastoral strategies that develop and nurture self pity in others. "Poor you" is a common pastoral approach, and when I've not been thinking, it's sometimes been mine. What are we thinking? How are we helping people? We are those who should proclaim Christ and call people to look to him and fix themselves upon him. Tragic is the pastor who fails to do this noble thing and is the bringer of nothing more than empty platitudes.